No one wants a tutorial on divorce. No one walks down the aisle planning for the marriage to end. At least not in a healthy relationship. Yet there is one particular thing any couple can do to significantly increase their chances of divorce. It’s simple: disconnect. I’m not talking about disconnecting from each other. I…
As a psychologist, I’ve spent time with hundreds of unhappy couples. They usually arrive with many stories to tell about how their partner has upset and disappointed them. Rather than having them repeat their laundry list of complaints, I try to switch things up. Often, I ask them to tell me what their partner is…
Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires” – Song of Songs 2:7 Every reader recognizes the significance of repeated phrases. The repetition serves both an artistic and linguistic purpose. This famous phrase from the Song of…
There are some things I say to my husband in anger or frustration that even make me cringe! In the fires of impulsivity, emotions rage and words fly. Certain phrases seem to slip out undetected and unannounced, without forethought or deliberation. Regret immediately surges through me and I automatically wish I would’ve just kept my…
We’ve all heard why marriages are falling apart: communication problems. Your wife didn’t give you a timeline when she left to run errands. Your husband would rather watch T.V. than talk to you. Maybe you punished the kids differently and forgot to compare notes. We as a culture have not only accepted, but embraced the…
