Hollywood very rarely affords the chance for viewers to watch the evolution of a marriage over a series of several movies. The audience is usually left with the idea of happily ever after. Yet, one science fiction series goes deeper than that. In Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones, Padmé Amidala, a senator, falls in love and marries Anakin, a young Jedi. It is a relationship that is forbidden, very Romeo and Juliet. There is such promise in the beginning of their love story. Nevertheless one misunderstanding destroys everything.
The Betrayal
[spoiler alert] In Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Anakin (now a powerful Jedi warrior) is on a path of destruction that his one-time mentor and friend Obi-Wan Kenobi is ordered to stop. In the system far from his home, Anakin is surprised to see his wife’s ship land. Sick with worry, Padmé Amidala rushes to hug Anakin. She had heard rumors that the Jedi temple had been attacked and everyone was killed (although she did not know this was Anakin’s doing). As Anakin attempts to explain away her worries, Obi-Wan Kenobi appears in the entrance to her ship. Unbeknownst to Padmé, Obi-Wan hid on her ship realizing that she would rush to Anakin’s side for comfort and explanation.
Anakin turns back to his wife, infuriated at the thought that she had knowingly betrayed him. He grabs Padmé by the throat and begins choking her in a fit of rage–his wife and the mother of his unborn twins.
The mere thought of betrayal was enough to send Anakin over the edge. His anger blinded him from the knowledge that his wife would never betray him. Padmé was willing to believe that Anakin had nothing to do with the evil that ensued earlier that day. She wanted desperately to believe the best of him. Anakin on the other hand believed that she committed the ultimate betrayal as a spouse and lover. He thought that she betrayed him, the person she had promised to love and protect for a lifetime.
Teammates for Life
I said similar vows on my wedding day. I took Justin, above all others, to be my husband. On that day, I promised that no other person in the world would ever become more important to me than my husband. Not my parents, not my siblings, not even the children we hope to raise someday.
One of my favorite analogies of a married couple is that they are teammates. A football team member would never take out a teammate in the middle of a big game. As husband and wife, we chose to do life together and fight on the same team for each other and our marriage.
No, my actions won’t cause my husband to fight a life-or-death battle with light sabers on a volcanic planet, but I hold tremendous power as his wife. I am the one person who has the most opportunity to build him up or tear him down. What power my words hold.
I clearly remember a phrase I heard my friend say to her boyfriend. “You’re such a freak, Jake, you’re such a freak,” she would laugh. I remember how my heart sank each time she made this statement. This phrase struck me as destructive and mean. There are some statements, in my opinion, that should never be made, even in a joking manner and certainly not in a fight, such as “idiot,” “jerk,” “freak,” or “moron.” They may not be a betrayal that will be featured in a blockbuster, but they certainly have power to destroy.
Fight for Each Other
[spoiler alert] Anakin’s thoughts and actions led to the death of his wife after giving birth to her twins. Anakin took on the title Darth Vader and pursued a very dark and unhappy life without his wife. Although this is science fiction, it is true that nothing good can come out of the betrayal of a spouse whether the betrayal is big or small. Whose team are you on? Are you fighting against them or for them?
