“Linda has a great need for social interaction, so she takes the lead on planning and arranging our social life,” Rick says. “Getting together with our family and our small group are two regular events for us. I know Linda needs social interaction, so I go along for the ride. I don’t need it as much as she does, but I don’t discourage her from connecting with others. In fact, she gets energized by it, so that’s a plus for me.”
As human beings each of us have many needs—emotional needs, such as feeling accepted, valued, needed, and supported, or physical needs, such as being healthy, cared for, and safe. We have intellectual and educational needs, such as finding meaning in our work and having healthy self-esteem. We also have social needs, such as having a sense of belonging, enjoying sexual intimacy with our spouses, and maintaining same-sex friendships.
“When we were doing our premarital counseling,” Linda adds, “this issue came up. Rick’s comment was that he’d do everything he can to accommodate that need. He’s been wonderful and is very supportive, and he’s such a servant in making our social events happen. He even enjoys our get-togethers—once they are happening.”
For Rick and Linda, having a servant-minded attitude and being willing to make adjustments when needed are two ways they continually work to keep their marriage strong. Linda says, “I have such gratitude for this man that I ask God to show me how I can bless him each and every day. I want to serve him, and I respect him, and I want to meet his needs—whatever they may be.”
How do you navigate differing social needs?
*Adapted from The ReMarriage Adventure: Preparing for a Lifetime of Love & Happiness. Copyright © 2014, all rights reserved. Visit www.SusanGMathis.com for more
*photo credit: {Lina} via photopin cc
