Answer (Gary Chapman): I would say you need to listen to your friends. Friends often see things that we don’t see when we are in love. In fact, when we’re in love, we are blinded and we really don’t see the things that others say. You know, your mother may say to you, “Have you considered he hasn’t had a steady job in five years.” But if you’re in love you’ll say, “Oh mom give him a break. He’s just waiting for the right opportunity.”
Your mother and your friends can see things about him that you cannot see because you’re blinded by your in-love euphoria. So, I would say you need to take seriously what your friends are saying. That’s one reason I wrote the book Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married. I would suggest the two of you work through that book because it will help you face some issues that you need to examine before you get married. I think working through the 12 issues I present in that book would be the best thing you could possibly do. Then hopefully you’ll make an intelligent decision to marry or not to marry.
