I’m a pretty good cook and I know how to make a house look spotless. I’m looking forward to being a wife and know God has been preparing me for marriage for over a year.
But I’m about 30 days away from my wedding, and I’m beginning to think I’m not ready for marriage, tying my life with someone else’s. Sometimes I don’t read my Bible every day. I don’t always do the laundry. I’m not always an encouragement to my fiancé, Michael.
And sometimes, I don’t know how to relate to him. I don’t know how to be his helpmate or how to love him. I’m starting to think God’s making a mistake. Maybe I’m not ready to get married. Perhaps I’m not cut out for marriage. And one day, when I have kids, how am I going to handle that? I don’t know anything about kids!
I turned my momentary panic into research and came across these life-changing verses tucked away in a little Bible book called Titus.
Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” Titus 2:3-5
Wait a minute. You mean I don’t have to inherently know how to be a good wife (and some day a mom)? Nope. God will refine me through the influence and example of older women. I’m not alone in this journey. You’re not alone in this journey.
I may not know how to make the perfect homemade pie crust or how to love my (almost) husband the way he needs/deserves to be loved, but God isn’t finished with me yet. When I say “I do”, I won’t be saying I know it all.
But that’s OK. I will seek out godly older women to teach me. And one day, after I’ve been married for a while, I will seek out a younger woman to teach.
The best part of the Titus passage, though, is that we teach each other and learn from each other not just to make ourselves better spouses, but so that no one will “malign (speak untruths about, defame or slander) the word of God.”
That is a tall order. Our influence in the lives of younger women will help bring glory to God’s name. I’m not going to sit around waiting to suddenly “be ready” for marriage. I’m going to seek out godly counsel to be the best wife I can be and to glorify the Lord.
