Guest post by Bill Yaccino //
1. The “5 Minute Trip Home” Secret
On the trip home after a day of work, spend the last 5 minutes in the car (or train, etc.) thinking about your spouse and about what he or she encountered during the day. Let your mind float from daily routine questions to deeper issues that deal with their opinions and feelings. Doing this will allow you to “enter their world”. When you see them, you won’t be giving them a cold hug or standard greeting, but a white-hot welcome fueled by intense interest in what has been ruminating in your mind for the last 5 minutes.
2. The “Reverse Role” Secret
Sometimes in the middle of a disagreement (okay, an all out fight!), my wife and I will call a “time out” and take a moment to restate the argument from the other person’s perspective. We reverse roles and argue on behalf of the other. On more than one occasion, this has caused one or both of us to stop, laugh, sometimes cry and begin to resolve the conflict with entirely new set of eyes.
3. The “Pulse Check” Secret
Most often, the next best steps in any adventure flow out of a clear understanding of where you are currently standing! Marriage is certainly no exception. For instance, do you know what your love language is? Take 5 minutes each to take the online 5 Love Languages assessment. It will help you learn how to give and receive love! Additionally, it’s FUN ad something that you can do together! Keep on eye on this and other websites for additional resources that allow you to check your “marriage pulse” regularly.
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Bill Yaccino is the Executive Director of Christ Together, Chicago, an organization that connects people and resources for greater Kingdom impact. In 2005 he launched www.WeddingPastorsUSA.org as a way couples that do not attend church can find a Christian minister in their area to help them on their wedding day. You can email him at [email protected], or visit their website – www.ChristTogether.com.
